Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Happy B'day to Christopher



















A Senior Picture
Stephanie and Christopher

















Christopher and me and Steph's wedding
















Uncle Chris and Roman



















With Lucy



Today is my son Christopher's 19th birthday. My heart is elated with the man Christopher has grown to be. He is every thing a parent could want. He's kind, considerate, gentle, hard-working, responsible, and affectionate. He smiles easily and readily makes me laugh. When I think of all these traits in him, I'm delighted from the soles of my feet to the top of my head. Someday he is going to make a lucky woman a fine husband. I'm glad I can see that in his future.

I was only blessed with one son, but I'm so grateful he is who he is. He blesses me so much. Adversely I feel heaviness of heart (a gross understatement) when I consider all my mistakes. No one was more impacted by my misdirected choices than my precious Christopher. He was an innocent forced to bear the sins of his parents. I cannot express the feelings I have when I think about this. Gut-wrenching is the only word that comes to mind.

Yesterday I read an article about a woman caught in fraudulent financial transactions within the multi-billion dollar public industry company she CEO'ed. After her very public disgrace, she turned to God. It's been several years since her "fall." She says she wanted to run from her past, much like I want to run from the truth of how I hurt my Christopher. What this woman concluded was that she couldn't run from it, so she had to find a way to incorporate it into her life. She seems to be doing that. I'm trying.

I read another article yesterday too. It was a man's synopsis of his greatest regrets in and lessons from his life. He hesitated to use the word "regret" because he is totally at peace with where he is. His article stressed how he is presently the sum total of his poor and his wise choices and decisions in life. I don't yet share his hesitancy in using the word "regret" (that's because I have so many) but I understand what his point is.

With all my heart I know that God knew before he created me or Christopher what our lives would consist of. Some how, some way, even the pain and hurt are part of His making Christopher and me into the people he designed us to be. He doesn't abandon us before His work in us is complete. How does He accomplish something good out of my messes? Hell if I know. But He promises to. I believe Him and am so thankful to know He's in control of my life and Christopher's.

Christopher is one of the greatest blessings in my life. I love him more than life itself. Even now I'm thinking of some of the reasons he gives me to smile. He's openly affectionate. I love him for that. He tells a funny story. He makes me laugh. He is kind to underdogs. He puts sunshine in my life.

Before he was born God gave me a verse for him. He has so lived up to his verse. "He who has a wise son delights in him. Make his mother and father be glad, may she who gave him birth rejoice." He has given me delight beyond measure, indescribable gladness, and I know I'll forever rejoice in who Christopher is.

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2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now you are making me cry....
Yes I too want to say Happy Birthday Christopher - you are definitely a delight, quite a handsome youngman as you have always been - a true gift to your parents of God's love
Happy birthing day valerie
You are a great Mom -covered w/love and Gods Grace
Lawana

February 20, 2008 at 10:57 PM  
Anonymous *mindi* said...

i always remember Christopher's birthday, though i don't know why since i don't remember all of my cousins. maybe because it is so close to your birthday?

Happy Birthday Christopher! :)

February 23, 2008 at 1:17 PM  

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